"Pant Shitting Story"

so last night i escape ns's laments and do a respectable 12 minute walk to trader, blatantly ignore slot machine and her lesbian friend and proceed to mix my johnnie black with heinekens as german tells me this wonderful gem.. around 10pm this monday this 23 year old college student from colorado walks into trader, hes a ston of a guy running InstantSoftware which is umbrella'd byHomeAway, some vacation rental company. so the dude whips out an african american express and proceeds to buy everyone in the bar multiple shots of johnnie blue (the price for which just got bumped to $25 a pop). 4am and he is blasted out of his mind. german is concerned so she half carries him outside, where another regular observes what happens next.. the shitfaced individual lies down on the sidewalk and attempts to finish his heineken. some random homeless dude comes up to him, takes away his drink, pounds it, lifts the dude up, throws him into a phone booth and as the hobo is methodically punching him in the face the guy is shitting his pants

-Tull