Richard comes up to tori and orders a cranberry and water. Immediately me and Brian, the construction worker who gave cigarettes, yell “pussy!” The Mexican on my left yells “would you like a tampon?!” And the Australian chick on my right throws.. a tampon at him.
**
Romeo: “Moe is the 6 million dollar man - he drinks!..BIONICALLY.”
**
Virg to Customer: "...so what you're telling me is you're black...and you're a black Jew...a black Navy Jew who drinks like a fish and watches football. That'll be 10 shekels please."
**
Fiddler...
Guy1: I haven’t seen Jimmy in a while
Guy2: oh yeah he’s dead
...
Guy2: nice mustache buddy
Guy3: I’m a fuckin Marine!
**
Hairy Chihuahua Lady: Trump is great - he’s the only man on the planet to have a prostitute pay him back.
**
Virg: “If you don’t remember it, it didn’t happen!... My whole life - didn’t happen!”
**
Mazz...
Woman: oh my god is this a rubik’s cube!? Can I solve it? Oh my god...I...I need to see what it looked like in its original state, then I can solve it!
Bartender: it’s a fucking square, dude.
**
“My dad once got shot in Chicago. Someone pulled a gun on him and he said, ‘That’s a really gay knife.’” - Paddy the Illegal Irishman
**
[The Lion Sleeps Tonight comes on the speakers]
Bob: I put this on to make Richard to feel more at home.
African Richard: (growls, leaves)
Bob: He’s probably hunting lions downstairs right now.
**
Mazz...
Carl: This place...it’s worse than a Nazi concentration camp. I always thought hell was in the afterlife before I started working here. I tell you what - I’m glad I don’t own a gun. I’d kill those two [playing darts] then kill myself....Also tell Kenzi I said thank you for the cucumbers.
**
Romeo: “Moe is the 6 million dollar man - he drinks!..BIONICALLY.”
**
Virg to Customer: "...so what you're telling me is you're black...and you're a black Jew...a black Navy Jew who drinks like a fish and watches football. That'll be 10 shekels please."
**
Fiddler...
Guy1: I haven’t seen Jimmy in a while
Guy2: oh yeah he’s dead
...
Guy2: nice mustache buddy
Guy3: I’m a fuckin Marine!
**
Hairy Chihuahua Lady: Trump is great - he’s the only man on the planet to have a prostitute pay him back.
**
Virg: “If you don’t remember it, it didn’t happen!... My whole life - didn’t happen!”
**
Mazz...
Woman: oh my god is this a rubik’s cube!? Can I solve it? Oh my god...I...I need to see what it looked like in its original state, then I can solve it!
Bartender: it’s a fucking square, dude.
**
“My dad once got shot in Chicago. Someone pulled a gun on him and he said, ‘That’s a really gay knife.’” - Paddy the Illegal Irishman
**
[The Lion Sleeps Tonight comes on the speakers]
Bob: I put this on to make Richard to feel more at home.
African Richard: (growls, leaves)
Bob: He’s probably hunting lions downstairs right now.
**
Mazz...
Carl: This place...it’s worse than a Nazi concentration camp. I always thought hell was in the afterlife before I started working here. I tell you what - I’m glad I don’t own a gun. I’d kill those two [playing darts] then kill myself....Also tell Kenzi I said thank you for the cucumbers.
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